German

Germany produces fine automobiles, guns, cameras, wine, and of course beer (and many other wonderful products, I'm sure).

Do you know the german alphabet? There are thirty letters:

a (ä) b c d e f g h i j k l m n o (ö) p q r s (ß) t u (ü) v w x y z

ß is a special german letter. It looks like a »B«
but actually it's an old combination of »s« and »s« or »s« and »z«. So it's called »ess-tset« (»ess« is the german name of »s« and »tset« the name of the letter »z«). (It's similiar to »w«, which is also an old combination of two letters: »double u« or »double v«!)

ß is pronounced like english »s« (in »mouse«) or »c« (in the word »ice«), e.g. groß (»big, great«) = »groce«, beißen (»to bite«) = »bicen«. (German s is pronounced normally like english »z«, and german z like »ts«.)

When a short vowel is followed by a consonant in German you use »double consonants« (bb, ff, ll, mm, etc.) Instead of kk you use ck, instead of zz you use tz, and instead of ßß you use ss.
So »groß« is pronounced with a long »o«, but »Boss« (»boss«) is pronounced with a short »o«.

Too bad I never learned German language. I did take three years of French in high school though. Someday maybe I'll learn German. And Spanish. And maybe even Japanese. Then I will know what they are saying in the anime cartoons. Maybe I should rent the anime videos with subtitles. But I like the accent too well.

Stefan was telling a story, but we weren't really listening. »... and then a wolf came down from the mountains and ate a German.« »What,« we said, »ate a human?« »Not human,« he sighed. »GERMAN.«

Isn't the nature of a language supposed to depend on how and where we use it? The early circumstances of my use of German (as a young student visitor in Heidelberg) were so overwhelmingly pleasant that I have been quasi -in love with the language ever since. The same cannot, alas, be said for my even more extensive acquaintance with French, especially of late years!! On the other hand – says she, apparently destroying her own linguistic argument – I've never actually used my A-level Latin, but have always found it perfectly agreeable as far as it goes....

German : Der Käse ist schwerer !
France : Le fromage es plus lourd !
English : The cheese is heavier !

50 kilogramms of cheese – Reiner Heugabel 48 kg